“You are so afraid to live, so afraid of life itself, that you’ve given up the very nature of your being in trade for security.” ~Insight from God, Neale Donald Walsh
Sweet seductive, security, I have to admit you have been my master for way too long in life and I am ready to release myself from the stronghold you appear to have over me. We all seek to have our basic needs taken care of and work to ensure we minimize life’s risks, while still deriving some joy from our daily lives. Yet, there is no way we can even begin to anticipate what life will bring us and how it will change us and our perception of what it means to be alive.
I have read many times, that no amount of money can bring back someone you love or your health. My understanding of this sentiment becomes stronger with each year I live and each observation of human relationships I witness. Yes, of course it’s important to have health insurance, a retirement game plan, among many other security tools. However, how much of your life do you devote to “insuring” you don’t experience a loss, rather than recognizing that today is all you have and that you must enjoy the gift you are given NOW.
I write about this topic because this is what I have to learn. I am a self declared master of delaying gratification and wizard at working hard toward long term goals. This ability has served me well in life in that I have completed several degrees, earned a healthy savings account and met many people’s expectations along the way. I have never been without health insurance or employment. I don’t deny these blessings, but I find myself questioning, at what cost does this come? Do I even remember what I really want or am I so busy ensuring that I am secure that I don’t even remember what I really want?
These questions among other life challenges have led me once again to the book: Conversations with God, by Neale Donald Walsh. Whether or not you choose to believe that Neale was divinely inspired to write this book or if these are his own thoughts, makes no difference in how powerful the words he shares are. One of the main lessons I have learned from this book is “what you think, you create.” Moreover, that we are all co-creators with God in this life and our main goal is to become the most genuine representation of ourselves we can be.
Operating from a continuous place of maximizing security over following a path that leads to a genuine representation of yourself is a recipe for a highly inauthentic life. Now there may be times when building security in your life is your primary goal, based on your current situation. However, many of us reach a good level of security and still clutch on to activities that only serve to enhance our security rather than allowing us to develop into who we really are. The interesting thing I have observed is that when I fail to venture toward who I really am and continue to travel down the secure path the universe starts to send me many situations that speak strongly to me about how it is time to change in order to become more authentic.
I see these situations presented to me and sometimes wonder, “why God, why me, why this, why now?” Yet, the silent observer within myself, smiles in the wisdom of knowing that this is all part of the ultimate plan for my life. The tension I feel is palpable and highly relatable to many humans. The choice I face is as well. “To be, or not to be.” ~Shakespeare, Hamlet.
Will I choose to go on living for security and the mundane pleasures of my body or will I face fear and choose to become (be) who I am really meant to be? The questions remains, do I really know who I am meant to be? Do I understand what it means to “live” and be authentic to who I am supposed to be?
For me, maturity and life experience are delivering answers to many of these questions. I believe that we are all tasked with being powerful observers and learning what it means to live an authentic life that allows us to “develop into who we really are.” The even more challenging task is to use these observations to make changes in our lives that enable us to have the opportunity to develop into what God and we ourselves have intended in this lifetime.